Just a Silly Feeling
by Starr484
Summary: What happens when Sam gets a 'silly' feeling?
1. Default Chapter

Title: Just a silly feeling  
  
Disclaimer: Don't own them. Now I can't be sued. Spoilers: None Category: Angst, H/C, series  
  
Rating: PG-13, just to be on the safe side Pairings: Slight Sam/Jack A/N: I've been thinking about doing the for a while, but I've become quite lazy when it comes to writing lol. I'd rather read stories that are good, so I figure practice makes perfect….or I hope so at least. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Chevron six, encoded." Jack O'Neill moved his head from side to side, trying to crack his neck. Then the laced his knuckles together and tried to crack them.   
  
"Jack, as beautiful as your symphony is, I think you missed a spot," Daniel mentioned as his friend prepared to go.  
  
"Wha...? Oh yeah, thanks," he retorted as he moved his upper body from side to side, cracking his upper back.  
  
"Chevron six, locked." O'Neill took one additional look around to check out his team. There was Daniel, trying to rub his glasses clean, even though they were as clean as possible. Teal'c stood as straight as possible, as always, ready to engage in battle, or whatever Earth-shattering news they would soon find. Then there was Carter, who was always thinking. Today, his second in command looked to be in a rather distraught thought.  
  
"Carter? Everything good to go?"  
  
"Hm?" She stopped momentarily to look at him. "Yeah I guess sir."   
  
"Good." He looked her up and down with his bottom lip slightly protruding which made her grin.  
  
"Chevron seven locked." The swoosh sound was their alarm clock to go to work.  
  
"Sir?" Carter asked.  
  
"Yeah." He turned his head in her direction for a half of a second.  
  
"Have you ever had the feeling that something isn't right?" He scrunched his eyebrows and started up the ramp.  
  
"Hm?" he asked.  
  
"You know, like something's.... off?" Now he was a little concerned. She was usually the optimist on the mission.  
  
"Everything ok, Carter? Is there something we don't know about?" She sensed the concerned anticipation in his voice.  
  
"Yes, sir. Everything's fine. Just a silly feeling." She gave her 'good-little-solider' smile and stepped through the gate.  
  
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"Any sign's of civilization?" Jack asked to anyone. These days, he didn't know whether to ask Daniel or Carter.   
  
"The M.A.L.P. showed a sign of possible civilization about two clicks away," Carter answered him, walking down the steps after sending F.R.E.D. home.  
  
"Ah, Carter! You should be a politician! 'A sign of possible'.... that's how to step around saying 'Oh, I think so.'" Instead of being offended like most people might have been, Carter wasn't phased.  
  
"Well, sir, if I was in politics, then you wouldn't have anyone to help you when you're stranded. Unless you wanted to try on your own next time..." she started.  
  
"No no, no no no. That's quite alright." They shared a quick smile.  
  
"I agree with Sam, Jack. There's a marker here that indicates that a village was, or is, a few clicks in that direction," Daniel said as he pointed north.  
  
"That direction. That, direction. Daniel, are you sure you should be working with the military?" Jack started on his usual banter as the team walked in the direction of the last know village.  
  
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Walking through the woods on the path, O'Neill noticed Carter keep tensing.  
  
"Carter?" She turned her head towards him. "Everything ok?"  
  
"Yeah, I guess sir. I just can't shake the feeling that's something's off about this place."  
  
"I also feel your apprehension, MajorCarter," Teal'c chimed in.  
  
"How bad is it?" There was no way anything was going to happen to his team today.  
  
"It is not yet clear, O'Neill."  
  
"Do we need to turn around?" He watched as Carter and Teal'c exchanged glances.  
  
"I see no reason to abort the mission yet, sir."  
  
"Ok, everyone be on your guard. I don't want any-" he started as he was quickly cut off by a staff blast shooting right over his head. The team quickly took cover. Daniel went with Jack, and Teal'c and Carter went in the opposite direction, but close enough to be in shouting range.  
  
"Surprises?" Daniel guessed at the answer. He had his back half on the ground, half on the back of the tree stump they took as cover. Jack was kneeling next to him, shooting back with his zat. He didn't want to waste bullets, yet.  
  
"Good guess. Carter? Teal'c?" he called to ask on their situation.  
  
"We're here sir!" she called back, taking turns with Teal'c to shoot at the enemy.  
  
"Crap!" they heard her say as she started zatting in the opposite direction. "Check your six!" she called out as a warning.   
  
As Daniel was about to turn around, he held his hands up and dropped his gun, hearing the noise of the staff opening curiously close to his head.  
  
"Um, Jack?" He was now away of the situation as he looked and saw Carter and Teal'c mimicking Daniel's actions.  
  
"Ok, ok. Take me to you leader." With the four of them grumbling, they trudged towards, well, they didn't exactly know where. But they knew it was somewhere they didn't necessarily want to get anywhere fast.  
  
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All four of the team members were led into a 'typical' Goa'uld chamber, or as O'Neill had dubbed them so. The ones with the tall torches, altar in the front with a chair for the 'god', and a wide open space for them to.....meet. All four were shoved down on their knees.   
  
"Be prepared to meet your new God," one of the lackey Jaffa retorted.  
  
"Really...." O'Neill drawled.  
  
"Silence! I know of your type! I will not allow you to bother us with your insolence!" the Jaffa snapped, backhanding O'Neill on the face so hard he fell to the side. Since their hands were tied behind their backs, he had to push himself up. Carter watched him with worried eyes. He quickly raised his eyebrows to her to show he was ok.  
  
"Yes, indeed Colonel O'Neill. We have heard of you. And now, it's time for me to show all of the false gods how to deal with you." A Gould walked into the room and looked them up and down. He had longer hair, that reminded everyone of Daniel's when the program first started, except it was platinum blonde. He had very high cheek bones, and piercing blue eyes. If she didn't know he was evil, Carter would've thought him to be strikingly attractive. He was adorned with colorful robes that were very beautiful.   
  
"And you are the real god we've been looking all over for. Thank the lord we found you!! Oh wait, lord, you being real and all..." O'Neill started again. To his surprise, he didn't receive another backhand. The Goa'uld only smiled cordially at him and continued to pace in front of them.   
  
"You, Jack O'Neill, you will be fun. Or maybe Teal'c maybe you would be more fun. Daniel Jackson, Daniel Jackson, Daniel Jackson. I must give you my deepest apologies for the death of the lovely Sha're." Daniel narrowed his eyes at the adversary, and wished he could be the next one to handout a backhand.   
  
"Ah, the infamous Samantha Carter. They did misinform me about you." She raised her eyebrow in uninterested anticipation. "You are much more beautiful than they told me." He grinned as he held the bottom of her chin and looked into her eyes. His grin grew when she jerked it away. There was something about his eyes that scared her.  
  
"Jaffa, listen to me. Take these three gentlemen to their guest suite. I would like to have a little time to get to know Major Carter," he said with a snap of his fingers.  
  
"Uh yeah I don't think so." O'Neill started to interrupt.   
  
"I had the feeling that you would say that...." The four teammates heard the unmistakable sound of zats opening, and after a second, three bodies fell to the ground, leaving Carter exposed. The Jaffa started to drag the limp bodies away when the Gould changed his mind.   
  
"You know, I could kill them right here and now."  
  
"Don't." It wasn't a request, or a demand. Simply a statement.  
  
"Or, I could let them go.... but what would be in it for me?" In that exact moment, Sam Carter knew what she would have to do, damned the consequences.  
  
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"Ugh.... Holy man." O'Neill tried to swallow the nasty taste out of his mouth.   
  
"Everyone alright?"  
  
"Yes, but MajorCarter does not appear to be amongst us."  
  
"Crap! That, Gould, who, he, yeah, didn't tell us his name....."  
  
"Did you recognize him at all Teal'c? He said he knew Sha're.... maybe Apophis ran into him some time while you were first prime."  
  
"I did not DanielJackson." The were interrupted by the sound of doors opening.  
  
"Get up, Tau'ri. You are free to go." O'Neill waved his friends the way with his hand, wondering what the true meaning behind their going was.  
  
"Yeah, do you guys have one of those comment cards? I wasn't impressed with the guest suite, it wasn't too nice, seen a few like it before." He quickly shut his mouth when the Jaffa opened his staff and smiled. "Okay.... I guess not. Ah! And we are missing one of our people. Would you know where, oh where, she would be? Perhaps taking a mud bath," Jack loved imitating rich people.  
  
"I'm right here, sir." Carter walked around the corner unaided.  
  
"Good, Carter. Well, let's move out then?" His strong statement turned weaker as he realized that everyone leaving wasn't going to be as easy as he thought. The look on Carter's face was horror, masked,  
  
"Um, I decided to stay, sir."  
  
"Carter," he warned her  
  
"I actually thought the suite was nice." Her voice was flat with adulterated emotions.  
  
"I'll find you a better one at home," he growled.  
  
"Not this time sir." O'Neill wondered if it suddenly became cold, or if it was only him.  
  
"We aren't leaving without you!" he barked out.  
  
"Ah, but I think you are. You forgot to pay for your bill, so I'm going to take some compensation. Hope that you don't come back!" The Gou'ld said and smiled brightly, as he walked around the corner. For a moment, Daniel thought how good of a hotel manager he would be. The three remaining teammates were grabbed from behind.   
  
O'Neill was getting tired of the hotel analogy, and he was ready to take some action. He reached out to grab her arms, and he knew she would be in horrible trouble if his ditch effort plan didn't work. He had a hold of her arms, but it wasn't tight enough. Their hands met for a brief moment, and their eyes locked. They both knew this was going to be bad. He was grabbed by the back collar of his jacket, along with Teal'c and Daniel, and were pulled away.  
  
"Carter! No let go! Carter!!" She couldn't look at them as they were led away. She hung her head and listened to all of them shout her name, trying to free themselves. When she heard the zat again, her head fell to her hands, knowing there was no solution to a rescue now.   
  
If they only knew why she was doing this, what she needed to do. She knew that she couldn't live with herself if she were responsible for the slaughter of her family. Hopefully one day they would find out what the offer was, and would understand.  
  
"Come come come now my dear. I will make you comfortable here! We will have a wonderful relationship." At this point, he started softly stroking her arms, which she found repulsing. "You tell me what I want to know, and you survive." Carter snapped her head up. His voice became demonic. This was the first time he gave any violent vibe off. Of course he was a Goa'uld, but he seemed for the most part not a violent one. How many times would another Goa'uld backhanded any of them when they talked back? Then she suddenly understood her feeling, that something wasn't right. His eyes flashed yellow as he grabbed her upper arms and she yelped.   
  
'Oh God, help!' she thought.  
  
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TBC...... Feedback loved, craved, desired even.  
  
Starr484 


	2. Just a Silly Feeling Chapter 2

Title: Just a Silly Feeling Chapter 2  
  
Spoilers: None really  
  
Rating: PG-13 to be careful  
  
Spoilers: None really.  
  
Disclaimer: Don't own them, don't sue me  
  
AN: Holy buckets everyone! My face is still blushing from all of the reviews! Thank you all sooo very much! And if I didn't get back to you I'm sorry and thanks everyone!! I hope I don't let you down!  
  
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SG-1 walked down the ramp as General Hammond met them in the gate room.  
  
"Well SG-1? How did it go?"  
  
"As well as can be expected, sir." Jack O'Neill was still a visibly broken man.  
  
"No sign son?" His voice softened so much that the team were they only people who heard him.  
  
"No, sir. Still no sign." Daniel answered for him. O'Neill just kept his head down as he left the room. He ignored everyone as he walked into the locker room and started to change.  
  
He didn't talk too much these days. He was tired of everyone's sympathetic looks. For five months, they searched for her. The official search ended long ago, but there was still hope. They looked at every planet. They looked in every village at every planet. They looked in every hut in every village at every planet. Jack even carried a picture of Sam around to show people in case someone recognized her.   
  
"Hey, Colonel. I just wanted to thank you again for letting me back on SG-1. I understand that I'll only a replacement...." Jonas Quinn started before he was cut off. He had just walked in the door and was leaning on the frame.  
  
"Ah, the youthful optimism. How I miss that. And Jonas, if you plan on thanking me one more time, at least include a box of chocolates." Jack's voice was rough with emotion. He unlaced one boot, and started unlacing the other. Jonas moved, and sat down on the bench perpendicular to him. Jack's body was hunched over from stress. Jonas only wished he could help.  
  
"Yeah, sorry, I won't bug you about it anymore." The two sat there in, what Jonas hoped, was compatible silence.  
  
"Off world activation!" Both men looked at each other and made off to the gate room to see who it was.   
  
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"Jacob! How nice to see you! How's the whole Tok'ra thingy going for ya now?" Jack asked with his usually faked enthusiasm. Jacob was walking down the ramp after just sending his IDC signal over a few seconds earlier. General Hammond was walking into the room when Jacob saw him.   
  
"Shut up. Not now Jack." Jacob almost plowed over Jack coming down the ramp.   
  
"We think we know where Sam is." He looked directly at George Hammond. It was his choice after all.  
  
"In the briefing room, now."  
  
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"That's where she is?" Jack was shocked to learn how close Sam was to them all of this time. They all sat at the square conference table. Jacob took comfort in Sam's old seat. They all hoped that she would be home soon to reclaim it. He took a minute to re-collect the last five months.   
  
They naturally went back for Sam after they were shoved through the gate. His knees never recovered from the final shove through the gate. Whether it was from the fall or the loss, Jack will never know. When they went back, the ship was gone. Everything. It was all gone. They had no idea where she was, no idea where to start looking.   
  
Now they just learned that she was only a few planets further away than Abydos.  
  
All this time. She was on a planet they knew as PX3-484.   
  
"General, we've gotta go get her. Sir, we have to." Jack's anguish was unmistakable. It was that of a desperate man.  
  
"Let's take a look. First, I want to send a probe in. Colonel, if everything is clear, then you have permission to take SG-1 through the gate to take an observation of the area." He took a second and shook his head. "Dismissed." They hadn't seen Jack move that fast in over five months. It would have been a beautiful exit if he hadn't tripped over his untied bootlaces.  
  
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"Jack, are you ready?" Daniel looked at his friend with worry. They were waiting for the ok to travel to Sam's rescue in the gate room. The anxiety was running rampant in the room. If Jack were any less of a military man, Daniel could imagine him pacing.  
  
"What the hell do you think Daniel? We're about to go find my second in command in God knows what condition." He re-adjusted his cap and looked down, and his voice did not rise.   
  
"O'Neill, do you realize that we may not locate MajorCarter?" Teal'c asked, standing behind him.  
  
"Come on! Don't you listen to Jonas' youthful optimism?" All three of them just looked at the Stargate.   
  
"Move out!" They had already received telemetry that there was a small settlement, or something like it, a few miles away from the gate.  
  
Anticipation swarmed through the entire complex. Everyone was aware of the situation. The didn't want to know what would happen if they didn't find her. The General gave them 24 hours until they needed to check in. If they needed back up, they could call home earlier.   
  
The team hesitated, until O'Neill walked up the ramp and disappeared without a second look back. Everyone knew that if he didn't find her, he wouldn't be back either.  
  
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"Tundi! Was that the Stargate?" Tamali called out from behind his bush.  
  
"I think it was.... that can't be good." The two slowly made their way up to the gate. They were quite as they motioned for their comrades to move in on the intruders.  
  
"Stop there!" With that said, the four strangers stopped dead in their tracks and lifted their arms. 20 men surrounded them with zat guns. They knew they wouldn't need to fight when one man told the rest to stand down.  
  
"Where do you come from?" Tundi asked.  
  
"We come from a planet called Earth. My name is Daniel Jackson, this is Colonel Jack O'Neill, Jonas Quinn, and Teal'c." Daniel motioned to all four of them in hopes that they would not get shot.  
  
"Earth....?" Tundi murmured to Tamali. There was a quite murmur throughout the group.  
  
"Yes, Earth. Have you heard of it?" Daniel asked with hope in his voice. The leaders exchanged glances before answering.  
  
"Come with us." They hesitated for a whole second before walking with the men. They weren't told to give up their weapons, and they weren't pushed or shoved.   
  
They didn't even question Teal'c about him being a Jaffa.  
  
"I'm sorry, but when I said that we were from Earth, you sounded like you've heard of it before..." Daniel led off to try to talk to Tundi, who seemed like the natural leader.  
  
"Yes, I've heard much about all of you, Daniel Jackson. But I wonder, where is Major Samantha Carter?" The four men froze. Daniel looked at Jack to see how he wanted to handle the situation. He gave Daniel the go ahead to tackle the question.  
  
"Actually, that's funny you should ask that question." He took a second to re-adjust his glasses. "We were given the impression that she was here, on this planet." Tundi was about to respond when they were interrupted by people yelling.   
  
"Tundi! The other team ran into trouble! We don't know how badly yet, but it's not good." Tamali picked up the pace with the rest of his people.   
  
Tundi glanced at SG-1 and told them to hurry. It turned out that the they weren't far away from the settlement. They ran up to it after a healthy jog. It was set up in almost a military style rather than a living settlement. They first saw it when they emerged from the, surprise to Jack, forest they were traveling in. It was in a clearing and was surrounded by trees. Dusty and dirty tents were set up for living quarters.   
  
"Over here!" someone called out to Tundi, and he motioned for everyone to follow him. He walked into one of the tents where they were laying the wounded people. Jack was wondering what the hell was going on. Where were all these people coming from? Who were they fighting against? How did they know about SG-1? And, most importantly, what did they know about Sam?  
  
"Hey, are you ok?" Tundi called out of the room. There were so many people rushing in and out of the little room, dressed in longer clothes, that they couldn't decipher one person from the next by the way they looked. The clothes were almost like robes, and reminded Teal'c of when the rest of SG-1 went to take Seth down.  
  
"We were on our way to find some good when we were attacked from behind. They didn't care who they took out." Whoever was talking set a body down on a makeshift bed.  
  
"You're hurt, you're holding you side." Tundi went to help the person by seeing how bad the wound was, which made the person stand up and hiss.  
  
"Sam... oh my god." She snapped her head up so fast she almost gave herself whiplash.   
  
SG-1 stood in shock. Sam stared at them, and they stood in disbelief. After all these months searching, looking, scouring all over the universe, the object of everyone's desire was standing right in front of them. Time appeared to stand still for the five team members who were finally reunited.  
  
"Sam, it's ok. We're here to help you, to take you home." Jack took a careful step   
  
forward. Jonas was surprised that Daniel didn't take the first initiative to talk to Sam. The look on her face was one of pure terror. Her eyes were wide with shock and fear. They didn't know what she was afraid of. She stepped back and held her hands up.  
  
"No...:" she managed to squeeze out before she passed out. Everyone robed rushed to Sam's aid, but SG-1 wasn't allowed forward.   
  
"Who are you?!" Tamali demanded. He was holding onto Sam's lip body, trying to keep it off of the ground completely. The women who were attending to the other people who were wounded rushed to Sam's aid as well.   
  
"I told you! We come from Earth, we are on a team called SG-1..." Daniel started again. "What's wrong with Sam?" The team became surrounded again.  
  
"Why did she look afraid of you? You are not her friends! Take them! Do not let them stay together!" As the panic ensued, the team was once again dismembered. SG-1 was being separated, but for how long?  
  
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TBC… hahaha hope you like it! 


	3. Just a Silly Feeling Chapter 3

Title: Just a Silly Feeling Chapter 3  
  
Spoilers: None really.  
  
Rating: PG-13 Just in case, a few harsh words.  
  
Disclaimer: Not mine don't sue me.  
  
AN: Thank you EVERYONE who reviewed for me!! It really helps me on my way. I'm sorry it took me a while to write this, but it's hard to write about stuff like this if you're constantly in a good mood. Let's just say Saturday night wasn't the best…. Lol. Much love to Josie!!!  
  
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Jack sat in his cell. It was basically made of mud. A mud room, how nice he thought. It had a window that he kept looking out of, and a door he kept his back too.   
  
The people kept coming in to ask him questions that he didn't know the answers to. Give him one of Sam's quantum physics or theories or something like that. If all else fails, the answer is magnets.  
  
But he had no idea where to start answering their questions. What happened back on that planet? If they claimed to care about her, why did they leave her there? Why did she look so frightened when she saw them? If she truly cared about them, wouldn't she be excited to see them?  
  
He was sitting there beating himself over his own head asking the same questions. Why in the world did she look so frightened? What happened to her? And for cryin' out loud, who the hell had her for the last five months? He heard the tell tale sound of the door opening again. Who knows, maybe the 8th time they asked him he might knows the answers to the questions that he had no idea what the answers were.  
  
"Look, I've told you a thousand times! I don't know what happened? Now, please, god please, how is Sam?" He sat facing the window, his head in his hands. He became even more aggravated when the new questioner didn't answer him.  
  
"Look!" he yelled this time with conviction as he jumped to his feet and turned around. He soon wished he didn't. She was right there. Standing in front of him. The woman he sought out for five months. Sam was right there. And he was scared still, standing in the same position he jumped up in.   
  
"Sir...." was the first thing he heard from her in five months. Sir, that word he hated, the word he wished that they didn't have between them, was the first word he heard he speak quietly in five months. It had never sounded as beautiful in his life.  
  
"Oh god Sam," was the only thing he could manage out. Within one superhuman step, he had her in his arms. She held on to him as if she were holding on for dear life. They were here. They both began apologizing to each other, and telling the other, 'No, it was my fault, my fault!'   
  
Then they both looked at each other, closely, for the first time. They saw the shared sorrow and pain. She reached up and kissed him. Only this kiss was totally non-sexual. It was the same exact way that she would've kissed Daniel or Teal'c or Jonas after seeing them for the first time in months. It was a kiss to actually feel him, to make sure he was actually there. And he understood.  
  
He didn't want to let go of her. Screw the guys, he had Sam. They'd understand. He needed her.  
  
"Sir, we need to get the rest of SG-1 out of their cells." He sighed in agreement, and squeezed her one last time, not too hard, for last measure. They walked silently out of the mud cell, and Jack followed her when she walked down the hallway to Daniel's cell.  
  
He didn't follow her in though. He knew that Daniel needed to see her too. They all went through hell when she was gone. Daniel assumed Jack's death grip on her, and she gave it right back. She looked at him and kissed him as well, just to make sure.  
  
'Better enjoy it now, Danny boy,' he though to himself. Next was Teal'c. She opened the room, and Teal'c stood at attention, with his hands behind his back.  
  
"MajorCarter..." it came so silently and so solemnly, that it only could have been spoken my Teal'c. She smiled the brightest that they had seen it in a long time.  
  
"God Teal'c I missed you too." They embraced each other for a short time. Teal'c also had a smile on his mouth, which was almost as rare as Jack's smiles now a days. They only had Jonas to go, and then they might get some information.  
  
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"Sam? Everything ok?" Tundi called out when they entered what appeared to be the control room. Skepticism was dripping from his words.  
  
"Yes, Tundi, everything is fine. Thank you." She gave him a small smile. "Let my properly introduce you all. This is Colonel O'Neill, my CO. This is Dr. Daniel Jackson, Jonas Quinn, and Teal'c. This," she added changing who she was talking to," is Tundi." The all gave a 'hey-how-ya-doing' smile to each other, with the exception of Teal'c, who only raised his eyebrow.  
  
"Sam!" A small boy came running from behind a group of people into Sam arms. By that time, she had bent down to meet the little boy. "Sam! Are you ok?"   
  
"Yeah, Kenbrun, I'm just fine." They could see that a special bond had formed between the two. Maybe they were prisoners together for a while.  
  
"So, Sam, wow." Daniel looked at her for a second, and then realized that he must be acting a little strangely. "So, what happened? Where were you? What, who, and all that other stuff?" Sam started to squirm in her skin. This was obviously not a subject to be discussed, at least not right now.  
  
"We have plenty of time for that later Daniel. Now, Carter, is there anything we can do to help?" Jack noticed her uncomforted and tried to change it. The last thing they wanted to do was scare her into not wanting to talk anytime. Whatever she went through was hard, and talking about that comes in time.   
  
She smiled at them and started rattling off all types of jobs for them to do. Jonas helped with bandaging the wounded. Daniel helped get the camp back into some type of order, and get any type of system going on essentials. Jack and Teal'c helped keep watch. Everyone kept an extra eye on Sam when they could. She appeared to be the leader of the camp.   
  
And everyone knew what they would do when they had a chance to talk to the people. Everyone was plenty interested in SG-1. Sam had been regaling them with legends and stories of their actions. And they, naturally, wanted to hear what had happened to Sam.  
  
It was dark out, and they were told they could break for the night. They met at a table and talked about their findings.  
  
"All I got was the same story from everyone. Sam was held by this Alumni guy or something like that," Jack started.  
  
"Alumbi." Daniel interjected. "She was taken off of the planet immediately after us. She was held prisoner for three months, helped break out, and has been part of a resistance for two months."  
  
"Yeah, that's what I got too almost word for word." Jonas took a drink of water. Well, he hoped that it was water. They were all distracted for a second while they watched a few women shoo a small group of children away from the door. Jack gave a small smile.  
  
"I would like to apologize for my earlier behavior, if I may." They all looked to see Tundi standing at the end of their table. "I was out of line, but I was only trying to protect Sam." Jack took a sip of water and minutely nodded his head.  
  
"I can appreciate that. No hard feelings." Tundi smiled at the acceptance, when Jack had an idea. "Tundi, come, sit, talk, discuss," He motioned to the open seat by him.  
  
"Thank you." Jonas and Daniel picked up immediately on his plan.  
  
"So, Tundi, how long have you known Sam?" Jonas asked first.  
  
"Ah... she was brought to my prison about a day or so after she was taken prisoner."  
  
"Prisoner. That's here, on this planet, that she came to?" Daniel pointed down to the ground, as if it would add emphasis.  
  
"Yes. Two months ago we had the opportunity to escape, so we took it.. Seized it, as Sam would say." He smiled, and hoped the banter would stay friendly.  
  
"Opportunity. What was it?"  
  
"A few of the Jaffa felt that what they were doing was wrong. Sam managed to talk to them, and change them into going against their 'lord'. It wasn't easy, and she did pay for it. But, in the end, they helped us escape. All of us." Teal'c was listening intently.  
  
"These Jaffa denounced their lord? Have they yet been killed?" Teal'c was very anxious.  
  
"They sure are. But they are hiding their true identify. They aren't powerful enough to announce to the world who they are."  
  
"Has MajorCarter not informed you about the rebel Jaffa?"  
  
"She did."  
  
"Why did you not proceed through the Stargate?" That was one question the rest of them hadn't thought of. Why didn't she? She could've come straight home after she got out.  
  
"Well, the area that the Stargate stands in is very dangerous. We were actually looking for enemies when you came through. It wouldn't be safe for someone to try to get through. We think, since you came through, that their positions are weakening, even if they did managed to get us in a different location. Sam also said she didn't have a GDO, whatever that is. I can't remember all of the different letters. She also promised Kenbrun that she wouldn't leave him." Tundi took a sip of water.  
  
"Kenbrun, yeah. He and Sam seem to have a special relationship."  
  
"They do indeed. Kenbrun's mother was killed when they were taken prisoners from their planet. Sam had almost shut herself down, wouldn't talk to anyone. I think she was trying to save herself by not letting anyone in." All of the guys nodded their heads as if they knew exactly what she was going through. "Those two met, and helped each other. Now, I can see the life in their eyes again. They saved each other." The team smiled at each other.  
  
"Sam has a special relationship with a girl on Earth she saved from a different planet," Jonas said.  
  
"Yes, Cassandra. Sam has told me much about her. She has told me much about the SGC."  
  
At that moment, the room exploded with silence when Sam stalked in. She carried a limp body in her arms. Her eyes were devoid of all that was good. Everyone looked at her as she stooped in the center of the room.  
  
"Who was watching the children?" No one answered her. The proverbial pin drop was heard. "I SAID! Who the hell was watching the children?!" She was shouting, but her exterior was calm. The group of women slowly raised their hands.  
  
"I hope you're fucking happy." She laid down the body of Kenbrun. She looked at him one last time as he lay there. She took her hand, and ran it gently down his   
  
face as if she were trying to lull him to sleep. The group of women looked down at the ground, embarrassed to face Sam. Everyone knew what Kenbrun meant to her.  
  
Jack had never seen her look the way she did. And it frightened him. He knew that look. He had that look once before. And he knew that she would have the feelings behind that look as long as she wanted. Something big would have to pull her out. The Stargate program pulled him out, what else was there for her?  
  
She walked over to the wall and pulled a map off. She walked over to the table where they were sitting. Opening the map up, they could see that it was of where they were. She stabbed a knife through the middle. Jack knew that minute that she had crossed over to the dark side, and wasn't coming back any time soon.  
  
"Rest up. I'm done with this shit. We move out tomorrow. "  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
TBC… wahahahahaha!!! 


	4. Just a Silly Feeling Chapter 4

Title: Just a Silly Feeling Chapter 4  
  
Rating: PG-13  
  
Spoilers: Just some basic knowledge   
  
Disclaimer: Not mine, don't own em.  
  
AN: Good lord it took me forever but here's another chapter! Thank you to EVERYONE who took time to review! If I didn't send you a thank you personally, I'm sorry but THANK YOU! I hope you all enjoy this!!  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Jack sat outside of the room the rest of the people were in. The night was getting colder, but he didn't even feel it on his skin. He was listening to the scraping sound of a shovel. She was shoveling his grave. He was only a small boy, so it wasn't too long.   
  
Everyone was grieving the death of the small child everyone came to know and love. Inside, they were crying, they were remembering stories, they were silent. Outside, she was scraping. And he was listening to her.  
  
"Sam," he started. She hesitated for a whole half second before she ignored him. "  
  
Sam," he said louder. She was audibly annoyed, and shoved the shovel into the dirt. She took a second to wipe a brow before turning to him.  
  
"Sir?" He could hear the attitude in her voice; she didn't want to be bothered.  
  
"You should get some rest. You've being going since, well, I'm guessing a long time." He actually didn't know how long it's been since she rested. At least rested for a few minutes.  
  
"I need to dig this."  
  
"I'll take over for a bit. Come on, hand the shovel over." He started to get up and extended his arm to take the shovel.  
  
"No, it's fine. I've got it." She pushed the shovel back so he couldn't reach it.  
  
"Come on Carter, I'm not that old."  
  
"You should rest up sir. It's going to be a big day tomorrow." Scrape, scrape.  
  
"Speaking of which, do you have a plan? And, you must be exhausted. Everyone needs to be rested up for tomorrow." He hoped that he was getting through to her.  
  
"Fine, sir. I've had worse." The scraping suddenly stopped, and she turned and looked him in his eyes. He's seen that look before. It was the look she used to give him when he would mess with her projects. He could take a hint. When she said she needed to do it, she needed to do it for Kenbrun. She felt she owed it to him.  
  
"All right Sam, don't stay up too late now. Turn the TV off after 11." She didn't laugh. She didn't smile. She was empty.  
  
"Rest up, sir," she repeated. She stuck hard to the military terms. She couldn't get emotional right now, and being GI Jane was how she did it.   
  
'Alright Sam, if you needed the military now, you've got it. I hope you can come out of it later though,' Jack thought to himself as he walked away to the sound of scraping.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Everyone was in the same room that they were in the previous, horrendous night. Everyone listened to Sam's plan to take down Alumbi. Everyone was nervous.  
  
"The arrival of SG-1 really helps us today. With their training and knowledge of the Gou'uld, they will be an asset. We have the hill in our area, they can't take it from us. We can use this to our tactial advantage. We can line it with C4, and if the Jaffa make it that far, we can blow 'em to hell. Half of you will stay here for the home defense. The other half will come down the hill with me. You will all create a diversion while SG-1 and I infiltrate the compound through the same tunnel we came out of. You will start fighting with the Jaffa outside the compound. Once inside, we will take him out."   
  
SG-1 could see how much respect Sam had earned with these men. She had turned into a wonderful leader who knew was she was doing. Her idea sounded feasible, and after she tweaked it with each group with some more details, it would be wonderful.   
  
They didn't mind that their packs were being picked apart. They didn't mind that they were included in her plan of attack without being asked. They didn't mind at all that they were going to go into battle with their friend again. Everyone was getting ready to go to battle, and Daniel decided to talk to Sam.  
  
"Hey, Sam. How's it going?" He was worried about her. He plan was the most he heard her say in four hours, not that she said much more than that before Kenbrun died. She stopped, looked at him, and continued overseeing the preparation.  
  
  
  
"Fine Daniel. Just fine. How are you doing on the bright sunny day?" Wow was she sarcastic.  
  
"Peachy. Sam, are you ready to do this?"  
  
"Mhm..."  
  
"You can't go in emotional. I know I'm not the trained soldier you are," he started.  
  
"That's right Daniel, you aren't. I've fought more battles than you cam imagine. I've fought more fights in the last, however long I've been gone, than I did in the year before! So don't preach to me that I can't go in emotional! I know damn well what I'm doing! And if you think I'm too emotional, then you don't have to come and take down another Gou'uld. Besides, how much emotion have I displayed since you've been here?" Daniel was shocked: he can't remember the last time Sam yelled at him. And he meant really yelled at him. People were looking at them. Jonas and Teal'c were ready to come over and help him out by the looks on their faces. He knew when to back down.  
  
"You know we're here for you Sam, no matter what." His voice was so soft and so sincere that she almost felt guilty, almost. But she was already back to Military Sam, no emotions wanted.  
  
"Alright then. Are you ready?" He stood and looked at her for a second. She wouldn't even notice if he walked away. He thought about touching her arm for a second, but he didn't want to get his ass kicked. He just wanted to get this over with so she could come back home and get some help.   
  
"Yeah Sam, we're good to go."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
The room was running rampant with anxiety in the minutes before the attack. Tundi was going to take the Jaffa on for the diversion. Tamali would stay back and head up the home defenses.   
  
Even though she would never tell anyone, Sam was nervous. Last time she ran through those tunnels, she swore she'd never go back in there to him, to what happened. She could still hear the silent footsteps of her fellow refugees, and feel their fear along with theirs. But if anyone knew what she was feeling, then there was no way anyone would let her go through with it. No matter what she has been through, she still had too many men that were too overprotective of her.   
  
Maybe she needed some girlfriends...  
  
"MajorCarter. Is everything ready? Or do you need assistance?" Even Teal'c was worried.   
  
"Yeah Teal'c, everything's fine." She took one look around and looked at the people in front of her. She looked at her family in front of her.  
  
"Let's move out!" They all moved outside and waited for Sam. She stood in the middle of them, on a part of land that was slightly elevated than the rest of the people.  
  
"When I first arrived here, I knew that I needed to get out and help as many people as possible because that was my training. Get everyone out, do the details later. But after spending time here, and going through everything I went through with everyone, I stopped thinking in a military way, and decided that I needed to get everyone out because you were in the same situation as me. After a while, I started to doubt in my abilities, and that I wouldn't be able to get everyone else out much less myself out. I started to give up. And you all wouldn't let me, you wouldn't let me give up. No matter what they did to me, or to you, we stuck together and we made a plan. Not a plan to live, but a plan to survive. And we did. We may not be living the best lives we can right now, but after today, everyone's life will improve. When we started this fight together, you were only refugees to me. Now, you are my family. And I'll be damned if anything else should happen to my family. So let's keep a clear head out there, and take back a little dignity!"   
  
Everyone listened with strained ears to her speech. No one had really heard her talk like that before, and they liked what they heard. A few sniffles were heard from the women who watched the children. As soon as she finished her last word, everyone cheered "HURRAH!" and threw their hands in the air, pumped, and ready to go.  
  
SG-1 was even amazed to hear her speak like this. They hardly heard her speak from the heart, and when she did, they listened. The speech almost made Jack sad, because he realized that she has become a leader. She was leading this attack, not him. And now, his suspicions were filled, she would make a wonderful leader when they returned.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Carter."  
  
"Sir." The way she looked at him told him that he shouldn't even dare ask how she was, or if she was ready, or anything else like that.  
  
"We have everything we need?" he asked after a slight hesitation.  
  
"We sure do."  
  
"Good. That's what I like to hear."  
  
"Same here, sir. Are you ready?"   
  
"When have I not been ready? Even when I'm on vacation, I'm ready." She smiled. She actually smiled at him. It wasn't a great one, but a smile nonetheless.  
  
"A vacation sounds good right about now." It was then Jack realized how vulnerable she really was. He could see it all over her face. Her hair was unbrushed, even though he knew she attempted to run her fingers through it. She had lines and dark spots under her eyes from not sleeping. Dare he ask….  
  
"You know Sam, when this is all over, you're long over due for some vacation time. There's always plenty of fresh air and fish, two of my favorite F's, in Minnesota." There, he did it. Wow, he didn't want to get hurt now.  
  
"Two? What's the other one?" she smirked at him. He almost fell over! Was this the same Sam who he's been with for the last few days? This felt almost… normal. This was too surreal. He hasn't seen his Sam in more than five months, and now here she is, back to her usual banter with him after a horrible twelve hours of finding out who she has become. It was almost like a weird dream. He needed some reality. That was her saying no of course.  
  
"Now now now… that's for a later discussion. So? How about it?" He waited for the moment of truth.  
  
"I think I'd love that." He almost fell over. Total mood change! He knew women could have mood swings… then it hit him. Maybe she didn't think she was going to make it out alive, so she was saying good bye and all the other things she wanted to say to him before she died.  
  
"First thing's first. Let's go fight a little, then have fun. Just like in the academy." He needed to let her know that this was going to be a real fight, and they needed to work for it, even though he didn't think he needed to remind her. Just habit from being the leader.  
  
"Let's do it." And with that said, they all left for the fight of a lifetime.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
TBC 


	5. Just A Silly Feeling Chapter 5

Title: Just a Silly Feeling Chapter 5  
  
Spoilers: Basic knowledge   
  
Rating: R  
  
Summary: Um… yeah it's short so read lol!!  
  
Disclaimer: Not mine, don't sue me!  
  
AN: I know this one is really short and I'm sorry, but I figured maybe this would be better than nothing for a long time. Besides, don't ya just love cliffhangers? Haha much thanks to Josie!!   
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
It was now or never, there was no turning back. Sam knew that, and she never felt more ready for anything in her life. SG-1 approached the tunnel that everyone came out of.  
  
Sam stood stationary at the edge, as her memories took her back to that day that set everyone free. She could still hear the muffled voices, telling people where to go, and the restrained foot falls. She could even feel Kenbrun clinging to her arm as she tried to rush him along with everyone else. Now her heart was beating next to her ear. The silent noises became louder and louder with each heart beat. It became so loud she didn't think she could take it anymore, and was about to put her hands to her ears.  
  
"MajorCarter. Are you able to continue?" The noise went away, as she saw the sweet face of Teal'c.  
  
"You bet Teal'c. Just try to keep up with me." She did not allow her mind to wander as they traveled through the maze of tunnels that she knew like the SG-1 compound back home, considering if they didn't move anything. The last thing she needed was to walk into a briefing room thinking it was the women's bathroom.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
They made it through the tunnels without any drama. It was almost too easy. The next part of their plan was to make it to the control center and take over. Sam was allowed to lead them, because none of them had the slightest intimation of where they were going. They knew almost nothing about Alumbi! The situation was a bad one, on top of another bad situation. And everyone just wanted it to end.   
  
They were going through the typical golden hallways in the usual formation, hoping that everything was going well outside. When the alarm sounded, they all flattened against the walls.  
  
"Daniel, what are they saying?" Jack asked. There was Goul'd being said all throughout the compound. He listened for a second.  
  
"There's an attack happening outside." The team looked at each other.  
  
"That's our cue." Jonas finally spoke up. Everyone looked around the team one last time, knowing what could happen. After a quiescent nod, they headed out.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
The were following Sam until they knew somewhat where they were. This ship was different than the other ones for some reason.   
  
"Here," she directed. "We have to go through this one hallway, and at the end of it is the control room."  
  
"Hopefully Alumbi will be so distracted with the fight outside that he won't notice us," Daniel wished out loud.  
  
"That is not likely." They all spun around to see a Jaffa behind them. As they all raised their weapons at him, they heard a snort behind them. There was another Jaffa, and more coming. After a long two seconds, they were surrounded.  
  
"If you surrender now, no one will be hurt at the present moment." They had no choice. They would all be killed in the matter of moments if they tried anything.  
  
"All right." Jack looked pained to say the words, which were almost inaudible. All of the weapons were slowly tossed to the ground, while the team raised their hands above their heads.  
  
"How did you know we were here? What about the fighting outside?" Jonas asked. He was visibly shocked. Everyone was. This wasn't supposed to happen, this was supposed to go down their way. The Jaffa only smiled at him.  
  
"A small Melshack told us."  
  
"Teal'c?" Jack cocked his head.  
  
"It means bird."  
  
"Ah. Always with the sense of humor. You Jaffa, you crack me up." Sarcasm was dripping off of his words.  
  
"Follow."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
After being lead through tunnels and hallways every which way, they finally made it to their cells. There were all allowed to share one, for now .  
  
"Roomy. We should try to find one home..." No one laughed at his joke. Sam just looked like she wanted to scream.  
  
"Was this the same cell you were in last time, Sam?" Daniel asked quietly.  
  
"No, but they all look the same," she said after a minute. "No, wait. This one is a lot nicer than the ones we were in. Bastard."  
  
"Who the hell would narc us out?!" She was visibly furious.  
  
"I don't know Sam. Who in the camp looked like the were a follower for Alumbi?"  
  
"That's a really stupid question Jonas! Who would act like they are about to betray someone! Maybe I should have been looking for the person who had a Goul'd communication device in plain view! Maybe that would have helped! No one would! God who the hell would do this!?" She was ranting and raving about the cell, and almost hit Teal'c, who easily moved out of her range.   
  
"I would." Everyone whipped around to see who their traitor was. Teal'c took a protective step towards Sam as she gasped in surprise.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
TBC 


	6. Just a Silly Feeling Chapter 6

Title: Just a Silly Feeling Chapter 6  
  
Spoilers: None really  
  
Rating: R for this one  
  
Summary: The narc is found out... read!!!  
  
Disclaimer: Not mine, don't sue me!  
  
AN: Again, thank you to EVERYONE who reviews! If I didn't get any, I probably wouldn't even keep writing! But don't worry, I'll keep at it for ya! Much love and THANKS to Josie! W/o her, the end would be… different. Actually, it would have been bad lol. Enjoy!!  
  
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"You!" Sam gasped. "How, I don't, how?" She couldn't even form a single complete thought when she saw her traitor.   
  
"Yes Sam, me." Tundi walked towards the cell with dignity. "I know you may not believe me now, but this is for the best." He looked like the follower to a cult.  
  
"What the hell do you mean you little worm?! There's no possible way that this could be for the best! What were you thinking!" Her exasperated movements were growing larger. It was almost as if she were trying to visually show him that he was wrong, but he was unable to see her picture.  
  
"All in due time, Sam. All in due time." His condescending tone wasn't flying over well with anyone in the team. Everyone was agitated, and knew that something needed to happen.... soon.  
  
"Come with me." The stressful attention between the quarreling groups was snapped by the Jaffa. The doors were opened, as Jack lead everyone out of the cell.  
  
"No time like the present," Jack retorted. Everyone had left the cell, except for Sam and Tundi.  
  
"Sam, you've always trusted me. And I've never given you any other reason not to. So please, remember that and trust me." She crossed her arms over her chest and slowly shook her head no.  
  
"And that's why I'm so confused. You never have given me a reason not trust you. Never. You always were there for me. You were the one who helped me, and let me live again. When we were trapped in here, I wanted to die. I wanted to take my own life! But you wouldn't let me, trust me you said. And lord knows I did. But how could you make a pact with the one person we hated the most? The one person we swore that we would take down as soon as the opportunity presented itself! And now you work for him? As far as I'm concerned, the Tundi I know was killed in battle." They stood in silence as their eyes said what their words could not.  
  
"Come before I shoot you myself." They whipped their heads around to look at a Jaffa who had his weapon drawn. Tundi offered to let Sam go first by motioning elegantly with his hand.  
  
"You first." As she walked behind him, she had to swallow the spit she wanted to spit at him  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Ah, how nice of you to join us, Samantha. How have you been? It's been a while, we do need to catch up," Alumbi spoke to her. Her other four team members were chained to a wall, one that she had seen before. The walls had a red tone to them, probably to cover the blood.  
  
This was the room, the room. The one she would rather die than see again. The room where she spent countless hours in, being tortured in every way possible. Her friends were to her left, and Alumbi to her right. The room was large, but she knew that he had things behind walls. Things that would flip out like those cheesy hotel rooms that had beds that flipped out from the walls. And she knew he had one of those too. She knew that too well. At the opposite side of the room was a door that led to a room that was worse than the one she stood in now.  
  
"Sammie dearest, you look lost. Come, hello." Alumbi called her back to reality holding his arms wide open, as if to get a hug from her. She was shoved forward by a Jaffa, as Tundi silently came in after him.  
  
"Sam, hey, Sam!" Her teammates tried to call out to her, to bring her to the reality she would soon have to face. But her brain had shut down. She was no longer in control. She was in her safe place now, back home, way back home. She was sitting in her old living room with her mom, dad, and brother. They were talking about nothing in particular, but it was fun.   
  
"Ugh..." came out of her involuntary as he smacked her in the face. She didn't even see it coming.  
  
"Don't want to listen again? Don't you remember what happened last time you tried that procedure?" She looked up to see Alumbi standing slightly before her.   
  
"Hey! She's had enough!" Jack's voice registered in her mind, but she didn't understand what was happening.  
  
Alumbi kicked her in the ribs, and she fell to the ground. He grabbed her by the hair and stood her up. She grunted out of pain and her hands flew around his, digging her nails into his hands. That earned her a backhand across the head. He quickly recovered his pervious stance, and ran her head into, well, she wasn't actually sure what it was. By this time, she had a cut above her right eye and blood was clouding her vision. He had her on the ground right in front of her teammates, but out of reach for them. They were all yelling and trying to reach her, but it was in vain. Alumbi reached onto the counter top, the same he ran her into she realized, and grabbed a tool. It was tool with a circular end with rings around it. Out of the circular top was a long extra piece.   
  
"Oh God-" she gasped. She knew what it was, what it would do.  
  
He put it next to her temple, and it sent energy waves through. She couldn't even hear her self scream. Then again, she never could. He turned on the ring, and it sent a different wave through, and a new wave of pain along with it. Somewhere, in the back recess of her mind, she knew she wanted this to stop. She had to fight it. She couldn't give up.  
  
Then again, maybe it was the she heard her friends telling her the same thing.  
  
She lifted her head to hit Alumbi's, and the contact was loud. She actually head-butted his nose, and it started to bleed. He jerked his head up, and she kneed him. His head flew forward and he let his tool go. She rolled from under him, and nailed him in the head again. She would have laughed, but it would have made her throw up. The aftershocks of the waves passing through her were enough to make her become dizzy. She grabbed her head and put her arm protectively around her stomach, as she tried to keep conscious.   
  
Alumbi jumped up as she was temporarily not in control of the situation. He smacked a button on the top of the counter, and the cheesy bed from the movies came from the wall opposite from them. The difference was that it didn't flip down from the wall, it turned around and came out from the wall. It was definitely decorated in the Goa'uld fashion. Daniel imagined the Hathor could have designed it, had she been alive. The bed itself was purple, and had bed posts on it. Light and dark purple see through cloths were draped around them. It almost looked pretty. Almost.  
  
He grabbed her and threw her on top of it, and jumped on it himself. He straddled her and put her arms above her head. He started to grind his bone into hers and bit her neck.   
  
"Ohgodpleaseno," she gasped. Jack didn't know what he was yelling. It was the first time they heard her yell out of fright. She was terrified. She couldn't move, or anything else. If there was one thing she couldn't live through one more time, this was it. And he knew it.  
  
One hand let go as the other covered both of her wrists. He knew she probably wouldn't move much, so there was no threat. He let his loose hand travel down her side and grabbed her breast. She tried to yell out, but it only came out as a squeak. After he finished painfully groping her, his hand continued down its imminent path. She kept mouthing 'no, no' over and over, but no noise would come out. She couldn't even hear anything. She could see her friends fighting for her, but she couldn't do anything.  
  
He seized as blue energy covered his body. Tundi came from behind him and shot him with a zat. She suddenly sat up and shoved his body off of her own. She was audibly disgusted and shook herself to reality.   
  
"Why?" She couldn't understand him.  
  
"Why what?  
  
"Why did you stop him?"  
  
"Sam, I told you I would never let him touch you like that again. I promised you   
  
that." She looked in his eyes and saw total innocence.   
  
"Why did you turn on us? Why Tundi?"  
  
"He told me that he would let everyone go, give you the Stargate."  
  
"When?"  
  
"When I was on patrol on night."  
  
"And what would he get out of it? What was your end of the deal?"  
  
"He just wanted one more fight, one more time to feel powerful."  
  
"God Tundi. And you believed him." She looked at him and saw how innocent he   
  
was.   
  
"I'm sorry Sam."  
  
"Where did you get the zat?" He pointed to a wall where Alumbi kept all of his weapons.  
  
"And we won outside Sam! We took the Jaffa down! It is a sure victory for us." She cradled her head into her hands.  
  
"Sholva!" Alumbi stood with a staff weapon from the wall and shot Tundi. Sam grabbed the zat from his hands and threw it at him, surprising everyone, even herself. The gun knocked him in the head, and he went down for the count once again.   
  
"Tundi!" She was sent spinning into reality when she heard him moan out of pain. She whipped around and saw him lying on the ground, holding the gaping hole in his stomach, with his hands covered in blood. He looked more like he was in shock than in pain, and she hoped he didn't feel it.   
  
"I, I'm sorry Sam, please, I'm sorry..." he apologized into unconscious. She hugged his body until he went limp. He had been holding a hand to her face endearingly, and it left a streak of blood as it fell with the rest of his body.   
  
She stood up, and her eyes were void of all emotion. Even worse then when they first found her. Jack knew she crossed over, and there was no turning back. She was gone.  
  
"Sam, Sam please come un-lock us." Daniel's pleas went unheard. She went to the now infamous counter and bound Alumbi's arms before he woke up.  
  
She disappeared into the room that no one knew anything about. They had never been shown what was in there. Loud cracking noises were heard from inside. She came back out with what appeared to be test tubes in a rack.   
  
"Sam, Sammie, we don't have to do this. I wasn't going to do anything to you. It was just for fun, Sam." Alumbi was starting to wake up, but everything was hazy. He only saw her mixing the chemicals that only they knew what the effects were. The look on her face was indifferent. She could have been back in her lab testing a new type of material for all her team knew. It was obvious she would have no regrets about what she was going to do.  
  
"Sam no!" Jonas knew full well what she was going to do. She walked over to Alumbi and plunged the needle into his chest. He was yelling and screaming, no words were comprehendible. He started to go into fits of seizures, dying every second. With no regret, Sam unlocked her friends and started down the hallway.  
  
"Well are you coming or not?" They all looked at her. Jack and Teal'c were the only two unfazed, or the only two who appeared to be. She knew that they were shocked about her actions, and Mackenzie would have a blast with them, but she couldn't deal with it now. The followed her out of the room to outside.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"We consider Tundi as much as a victim as Kenbrun or anyone else here who suffered at his hands." Tamali was saying good bye to everyone.  
  
"As do we." Teal'c nodded his head and walked toward the gate as it opened. Jonas and Daniel were already waiting.   
  
"I'll come back in a while. I have to get everything sorted through first at home. Don't worry, I won't desert you." They shook hands, and gave a one armed hug. Jack called out to Daniel to dial home, and shook Tamali's hand as well. After the other three went through the wormhole, it was just Jack and Sam. But Sam couldn't go through.  
  
"Sam? It's going to be okay now." She just looked at him and raised an eyebrow, like Teal'c.  
  
"Ok, so I lied. It's going to be hard. But better. Come home. It's time. Wow, it's really time." He looked at his watch. The 24 hour mark was now. She nodded her head, took a deep breath, and stepped through.  
  
"There's no place like home," she muttered under her breath.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
She reappeared on the other side shaken. She looked and saw the very walls of the SGC she had been dying to see for so long. She didn't look immediately at anyone, only around the base with a look of amazement.   
  
"Sam, oh my God it's you!" Janet was at the bottom of the ramp, just as stunned to see her friend once again.  
  
"Major Carter!" another person cried. It was too much, too many people, too many memories, too many voices. The last thing she felt was Jack catching her as she fell.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
TBC 


	7. Just a Silly Feeling Chapter 7

Title: Just a Silly Feeling Chapter 7  
  
Spoilers: Just basic knowledge, except Heroes I didn't happen cause Janet rocks  
  
Rating: PG-13 I guess  
  
Disclaimer: Not mine don't sue me!  
  
AN: Thanks so much to everyone who R&R!! I'm sorry that it took me forever to put this one back out. I wouldn't keep it going if I didn't get the response I did. Hope you like it!  
  
"Gah…" Jack mumbled into his hands. He was sitting next to Sam's bed on a stool, his feet on the bottom ring and his elbows on his knees. His hands were holding his head up.  
  
"I know how discouraged you are Sir; just give it a little more time. Her body has gone through one hell of a trauma." Janet Fraiser looked over at him after checking her clipboard.   
  
"I know, I know. It's all just, surreal." Janet listened patiently. "For months, we didn't know where she was, if she was alive, anything. And now, after thirty-six hours, she's here. And I don't know if I'll know her anymore." He rubbed his head again.  
  
"That's nonsense. She's the same Sam Carter we all know. It might be hard, but she's a fighter. She'll come back." She put a reassuring hand on his shoulder. Unbeknown to them, Sam started to come out of her lucid stasis.   
  
"You didn't see her, Doc. How she was, the look of emptiness in her eyes. She reminded me of, well, me, when I first started the Stargate program. She didn't care if she lived or died, as long as she got to kill Alumbi."  
  
"Alumbi… Now that's the Gou'uld who had her all of this time," she interrupted. He nodded, and opened his mouth to speak again, only to shut it when he saw Sam move.  
  
"No… stop this. I don't want to do this anymore. You can't trick me any more." She started to mumble as she moved. She sat up much faster than both of them had anticipated, which made them involuntarily jump back. Before they knew it, she was on her feet, ready to run.  
  
"Sam! Stop this! You can't do this right now!" Jack tried to get a hold of the situation.   
  
"Why's that? So I can go back to the cell? No! I don't think so." She already moved into a fighting stance.  
  
"Sir, I think she's having a flashback."  
  
"This isn't a goddamn flashback. This is the same goddamn stupid trick you use every time! I'm not going to do this anymore. You will stop." Her eyes narrowed and dilated, she started to move in her stance, ready to run.   
  
"Carter! Stand down soldier! That's a direct order!" Jack hoped that an official order would bring her back.   
  
"Oh right away Colonel O'Neill! Whatever you say Colonel O'Neill sir!" she yelled and gave him a mock salute before running into him. She tackled him much like a football player would, head under the armpit and arms around the waist. He let out a surprised 'umpf!' as he hit the wall and slid down. Luckily for him, Daniel, Jonas and Teal'c were on their way to see how everything was going, and arrived just in time to see everything go down.   
  
"Sam!" Daniel called out, before he dodged a kick to the face. He knocked over an entire tray of Janet's tools before recovering his balance. Jonas slipped behind her when she tried to kick Daniel, but she noticed him and elbowed him in the chest, knocking the wind out of him. Jack was getting off of the floor when Jonas pushed him right back down.   
  
Teal'c had her in a bear hug from the back, trying not to hurt her. As much as he had missed her, he didn't want her hurting anyone else. She was using him as leverage to try and kick whoever got into her path, screaming words that no one wanted to understand, but they did. Jack shoved Jonas off of him and grabbed her legs so she couldn't kick anyone anymore. As she was bucking, screaming, and squirming against Teal'c and Jack, Janet rushed back in with a needle full of a sedative to calm her down. It took a few seconds for the medicine to even kick in, but she eventually stopped moving as harshly as before. They both carried her back to her gurney and laid her down when she became still enough. She was still murmuring as she slipped into a passed out state.   
  
"What the hell was that?" Janet asked.  
  
"That, Doc, was just a glimpse of what I was talking about," Jack said as he pulled Jonas up. Everyone took a second to take in the destruction caused by their newly found friend.  
  
"She had a flashback, Sir. There was no way she could control what happened. In her mind, she was still in Alumbi's control. And she wanted out." They all sat around the briefing table, filling in General Hammond about what happened.  
  
"Doctor Fraiser, is there any way we can prevent this from happening again?" His voice was soft with concern. He was as distressed as anyone to hear this information.  
  
"Unfortunately, no. In order to prevent her from hurting herself or anyone else, I had Major Carter put into restraints."  
  
"Are you stupid!" Jack screamed from the opposite side of the table.  
  
"Colonel O'Neill! This is a warning!" Hammond yelled back. As much as he liked Jack, he couldn't have him yelling at everyone.  
  
"Sorry, sir. But what I mean is, well, are you stupid, Doc? You don't know what she went through the last few months! The last thing she needs is to wake up and think she's back there, again, with lord knows what happening to her! If she thinks she's back there now, and she wakes up with restraints on, we'll lose her forever. Sir, we need to go get them off now." Jack pleaded to Hammond. With only a curt nod, a colonel, two doctors, and two aliens were running down the hallway.  
  
"Sam, I'm so sorry we put you in these." Janet started apologizing to the silent woman as she started to unbind her.  
  
"Please Sam, say something." Daniel sat down next to her and put his hand over hers. Her unwavering stare moved to where they touched. Her look of impudence turned to one of confusion.  
  
"Yes Sam! I know you remember us. This is us, here, at the SGC, in the infirmary, with everyone you know and trust!" His quiet shouts only brought more looks of confusion.  
  
"You aren't with Alumbi anymore, Sam," Jonas interjected. She jerked her head to Jonas and narrowed her eyes, remembering Alumbi. She jerked her hand away from Daniel and crossed her arms in front of her.   
  
"Are you stupid?!" Daniel yelled at Jonas. Daniel didn't care that at the moment he was acting like Jack.  
  
"DoctorJackson, I believe JonasQuinn was merely trying to remind MajorCarter where she is," Teal'c put in.  
  
"I understand that Teal'c, but now any chance I had with Sam is gone! I was getting through to her, she was starting to understand us. And he brought him up! Of all of the stupid things I've had to deal with in the last eight years! And believe me there have been a lot!" Daniel was about a foot away from Jonas' face.  
  
"Alright! Enough already! No more yelling." Jack walked out of the infirmary. "Yes, Jonas screwed up. But we can't let that rule how we're going to help Carter. I'm going to go back in there, alone for now. So everyone, go get something to eat, take a shower, sleep, whatever. Just calm down." Everyone nodded their heads and started to walk away. "Oh, and Daniel? I took that personally…" Jack retorted as he held his hand perched mockingly over his heart. Daniel looked at him for a second, unmoved. He looked down, ran his hands through his hair, and smiled at him.  
  
"It's hard Jack. I'm worried about her. I've missed her so much." He took his glasses of to rub the bridge of his nose.  
  
"I know Daniel. We all have. We all have." Jack patted him on the shoulder before walking away.  
  
"So, having fun yet? Or are you still not talking…" For some reason, he felt like he was questioning a prisoner or something. That's when he got an idea.  
  
"Remember when you had that accident with the entity? God, de je vour all over again. You sat there, looking at me so empty. And I'm not gonna lie, it scared the crap outta me. Just like you are now. Would he know about that?" She stiffened a little. "Still think I'm lying? Ask me anything. About anything. About the SGC, you, your family, anything only I would know." She started thinking.  
  
"What was my childhood dog's name?"  
  
"You never had one."  
  
"What is my brother's name?"  
  
"Mark. Come on, Carter. Gimme a hard one, like what's the square root of pie?"  
  
"How many times have I died?"  
  
"Too many."  
  
"Am I dead now?"  
  
"No." He was almost shocked at the seriousness of her questions.  
  
"Where was our first kiss?" Jack smiled at that one. He leaned back in his chair, crossed his leg over his knee, threaded his hands together behind his head, and started to tell his tale.  
  
"Well, you see, I was taking an honest to goodness shower in the Men's locker room when there was a nasty virus going around. I was almost done when I was jumped by a young captain." He let a smug grin cross his face. "By the way Carter, do you still have that scar?"   
  
The scar comment broke through to her. Her eyes widened in shock. Alumbi never knew how she got that scar. She looked away, and covered her mouth with her hand.   
  
"Oh my god..."  
  
"It is us, Sam. We're here. And we're not going anywhere." He put a reassuring hand on her arm as she shook her head.   
  
"I wanna go home."  
  
"You are home."   
  
"No, to my house. I wanna go home, to see it. I wanna go home." It all came out in one breath.  
  
"I'll talk to the Doc and the General. I think it'd probably help." Just then, Daniel came in.  
  
"Sam, are you doing better?" He stood beside Jack, who had just stood up.  
  
"Yeah, Daniel, um, sorry about the whole, trying to kick you thing." She did a quick smile and a nervous laugh while she was trying not let out a sob.  
  
"It's quite alright Sam. I'm always on my toes around you." He smiled at her and rubbed her arm. He heard the silent sob, and knew she was back.   
  
"MajorCarter, it is uplifting to see you awake." He also was quite when he talked to her. His eyes told her how happy he was that she was back.   
  
"Hi. Sorry about, yeah not going to say it again." Jonas came in after Teal'c. He tried to avoid eye contact with everyone, but he was too happy to see her.   
  
"Me too, about the knocking the wind out of you." The team gathered around her, but not too closely. They knew she was going to need space, but they were going to go to her boundaries.  
  
"You guys keep her company. I'm going to go talk to the General and Fraiser."  
  
"It's…clean." Sam walked into her house for the first time in six months. They let her out of the infirmary, only with Jack as a guide and driver. She seemed almost in shock as she touched everything.  
  
"You didn't think we'd let your house go to junk, did ya?" Jack replied as he walked in after her.  
  
"Well, I don't know. I was MIA for six months, I though for sure you would have boxed everything up and sold the house." She picked up a picture of her dad.  
  
"Has he been told? That I've been found and everything?"   
  
"He was the one who told us where you were. He only came to deliver the message and then leave again. I'm sure he's been told. We had one more week."  
  
"What? One more week for what?"  
  
"To take care of your house before, everything." He said his words very quietly, and stuck his hands in his pockets. She looked away from him and put the picture back down.  
  
"Well aren't I lucky." She sat walked over to her couch and sat down, looking around the room, taking everything in. She looked like someone who went back to their childhood house for the first time in twenty years.   
  
"Hey, are you ok?" He sat down next to her.  
  
"Just fine, just fine."   
  
"You look tired. You should get some sleep."  
  
"I'm not really tired."  
  
"Yeah, you are. I mean, you have these huge bags under your eyes, and I heard those could turn to wrinkles, and you could use to gain a few pounds too." He stated in his special joking voice for her. She only smiled, then looked down.  
  
"Yeah, I guess I do look like hell."  
  
"Well, I didn't say that…"  
  
"I, um, I don't want to. You know." She looked at her folded hands that were sitting in her lap.  
  
"You still don't believe us. You still think you're back there, with him." She bit her lower lip, but couldn't meet his eyes.  
  
"You don't really understand."  
  
"I do more than you think."  
  
"But not in the same way." She let a growl of frustration escape as she rubbed her hands on her face.  
  
"I can't tell you how many times I've been here, how many times I let myself believe that I've been found, and I'm home, and I'm safe. I don't think I can do it again. And God! How stupid am I for saying this out loud! Just more ammo to use against me. So, I figure, if I don't go to sleep," she started  
  
"Then you won't wake up back there," he finished for her. She slowly nodded her head. He knew that even saying that out loud meant that she had some hope in her, and that all was not lost. But it wasn't going to be a walk through a chocolate tasting factory either.   
  
"Tell you what. Let's take a nap. I'll stay with you. And when you wake up, I'll be right here."  
  
"But what if your not?"  
  
"But I will be. Please Sam, trust me." She looked into his eyes and finally saw his desperation. He needed this just as badly as she did. She wondered how many nights he spent awake, needing her, and wondering if she would be needing him.   
  
'What the hell, why not,' she thought to herself. She shook her head yes. He put his arm around her and brought her closer to him. They both put their feet on her couch. Luckily, she had a really wide one. Her head and hand were resting on his chest, and he was holding her next to him. Before drifting off, she thought that it was a little funny that she didn't feel too awkward. Maybe because she was just so tired….  
  
"Don't worry, I'll be here," he whispered before he dozed off himself.  
  
Oh so TBC!! Keep tooned! 


	8. Just a Silly Feeling Chapter 8

Title: Just a Silly Feeling Chapter 8  
  
Spoilers: Just basic knowledge  
  
Rating: PG-13 I guess  
  
AN: Back by popular demand! Thanks everyone for the quick reviews! I wouldn't have written this as fast if it wasn't for you guys… so thanks!  
  
Jack awoke a short while later, somewhat surprised where he was. Four days ago, he was Carter-less, unable to fully function to any degree, other than to find her. And now, she was asleep in his arms, his arms, in his world, with him. He squeezed her slightly just to make sure, and let out a sigh of relief.   
  
Then he started to notice how uncomfortable she was. She was still asleep, her eyes were constantly moving. He realized she was having a bad dream. He knew how bad it could be when woken up from a bad dream; it could be as bad waking someone up who was sleep walking, the person can be so disoriented. Unfortunately, he had no time to make a decision.  
  
"GET OFF ME!" she started screaming at him. He immediately let go of her and sat up, but didn't want to keep to distant. She didn't know where she was, so she thought she was back with Alumbi he realized.   
  
"Sam, Sam! Sam stop you're here!" He tried to calm her down, but it wasn't working.   
  
"No! I'm tired of this! I won't let you do this to me anymore! Just kill me already! God please just make it stop and kill me!" Jack was shocked at the desperation in her voice, did she ever ask Alumbi to kill her before or was this the first time?  
  
"Sam! I'm not going to kill you, god! Stop! You're home! Please calm down." He was pleading with her.  
  
"Bullshit! I won't put up with this anymore! I'll finish it myself! I hate you!" She shoved herself away from him as he started to walk over to her and moved to her kitchen. She went to a drawer and pulled out a large butcher knife and looked at him.   
  
It was dark out now, and the only light on was the one in the living room where they were sleeping. In the darkness, the shadows hid who she used to be and showed who she had become. Their happy, light Sam Carter was gone, and the empty shadow of her now remained. The shadows under her eyes made her almost unrecognizable. Her eyes were also dark and suspicious. And now he was afraid of what she would do to herself, and him.  
  
"Sam, god Sam please. It's me! I promise you it's me! Just give me the knife." He put his hands in front of her in a non-threatening manner. His voice was slow and calm. This is where his training kicked in, but they never trained him to deal with a suicidal friend who he happened to care so much about.  
  
"Screw you. I'm not going to be your toy anymore. I'm finished. I'm done. No more. I can't take it anymore." Seeing her like this was killing him. He knew now that she was broken. If they were trying to get information out of her, she might have given it up. And he couldn't blame her. And then he saw her hand to slightly shake. She knew where she was and she was afraid.  
  
"You know you're here. You don't want to be here." He tried not to sound accusative towards her as he dropped his arms and took another step closer.  
  
"What?" She was confused.  
  
"You don't want to believe that everything happened. You would rather be there. Why Sam?" He didn't understand any of this at all. Why wouldn't she want to be home? And now he got through to her. The knife clattered on the floor as her hands when to her face. She sucked in a large breath and turned to the counter as she put a hand on one to keep her balance. Jack instantly rushed to her side, after kicking the knife away. He reached her right as her knees buckled.   
  
"Oh my god, oh god….." Was all that she could manage out.  
  
"Sam we're all here for you, please just let us help you," he whispered into her hair. She was sitting on the ground and he was cradling her, very much like the way he held Daniel when he was going through withdrawal symptoms.   
  
"I'm sorry I didn't want to be here," she whispered to him.  
  
"Why? Why didn't you want to be here?"  
  
"Because that means it was all real. Everything actually happened. I went there, got kidnapped, then all of that stuff actually happened. I had hoped, god as stupid as it sounds, that I would wake up one day and it would all just be a bad dream." She clung to his arm as he gently rocked her.   
  
"I'm so sorry that you had to go through that Sam. It isn't fair to you at all. If I could go back, god I would have Sam. I tried! We did! He had left so fast after he took you we had no idea where to look! God I'm so sorry." He had to stop talking because his voice was cracking with emotion. They sat there, taking in everything for a while. He assumed that she had passed out from everything happening that day.   
  
He picked her up and went into her room. They kept it nice and clean for her, so it wasn't too awkward for him to be in there. He put her down on the bed and ran his hand through her hair as he sat down next to her. She opened her eyes and turned to him, and he let his hand run down her face and hold it. She put her and on his wrist and stroked his hand with her thumb.  
  
She scooted over as he lay down next to her again, but this time more comfortable. They lay together very much how they had before, she was laying on him and he was holding her.   
  
"Sam, try to sleep. You need it." He was running his hand through her hair to try and soothe her.  
  
"I know. I don't want to though. Every time I close my eyes…" she started as she involuntarily shuddered.  
  
"I know, believe me, I know. Just try not to think of it." She snorted a laugh at him.  
  
"Okay… so what am I supposed to think about then?" The irony wasn't lost in her voice.  
  
"Easier said than done, true. Think about what you want to do now. You're home, think about your job, you dad, your family. Even the dog you should have had as a child," he joked with her. He smiled as a small smile grew on her face. She snuggled into him more, trying to lose herself, and closed her eyes.  
  
A few months had passed since the first night she came back and was with Jack. They never spoke about it, but they both knew she needed it. There was no awkwardness between them for that reason, but no one knew about it.  
  
"Ready Carter?" They were standing on the ramp, ready to go. She had been off- world a few times before today, but today was their first time out again as SG-1. It was just a recon mission, nothing military. Just to get them back into the ease of the team.   
  
Unknown to her, Jack was going to put in a good word for her to command a team of her own. He was really impressed how she led the rebellion. She needed a little more time to get used to everything, but she deserved it.   
  
"Sure am sir. Are you ready?" she asked back in all seriousness, a smile in her voice. It had been a hard few weeks, but she was starting to face everything. It was good to have her back.  
  
"We'll see Carter, we'll see." He patted her on the back and walked up the ramp. She walked up after him, with Daniel and Teal'c behind her. Jonas had left to go back and help his world out. They were happy to see him come back.   
  
The world looking like every other world out there, green trees and such. They walked down the path to talk.  
  
"SG-12 was here a week ago, and they said to take the path straight to see what's interesting for me." Daniel pushed up his glasses by his nose as he looked forward.  
  
"Interesting for you… so that means more archeological stuff, right?" The lack of enthusiasm was evident in his voice.  
  
"Right Jack! Aren't you excited?" he asked with mock excitement and hit him on the back, which earned a certain look he didn't want to receive, but he didn't care and he walked down the path. Teal'c raised his eyebrow and grinned, as he walked after Daniel. Daniel waited for him and started rambling on about what he thought they could find. Sam smiled at Jack and followed the two, and Jack rubbed off whatever Daniel could have left.   
  
"Daniel! We've been here over and HOUR! Haven't you found the stupid entrance yet?!" Jack yelled at him. He was laying on a rock, his back arching over it and his head upside down. His sunglasses were on top of his head as he was rubbing his eyes in boredom.   
  
"Hey! I think I found it!" He was working on an entrance to a cave they found. It looked like Gou'uld, but very abandoned. There was no reason to think that anyone had been there in a while. He pressed a part of the rock in, and the cave door opened.  
  
Everyone walked in and took a look around. It was dark, but the room soon lightened from the movement.  
  
"Oh my god," Daniel muttered. Everyone looked around in shock and horror. There were machines everywhere that didn't look too friendly. The room itself was dark and dim, even with the new lighting.   
  
"Teal'c, what the hell is this place?" Jack asked.  
  
"It is a Gou'uld torture chamber, " he whispered.   
  
"This is, horrifying." Daniel stated as he walked in further. "I wonder how some of them were used.  
  
"Daniel, let's go," Jack said, his voice quiet as he remembered everything that had happened to himself and others.  
  
"Jack, wait. I just need to get a picture of these things first so we can have them on file." He was already oblivious, forgetting about a major who was standing in the doorway, frozen with fear. Her hands were on both sides of the entrance, holding herself up.  
  
"Daniel! I said let's go," he retorted more sharply this time, trying to make him understand.  
  
"Just a second Jack! I'll be done in a minute." He didn't even see her coming.  
  
"You want to know what the hell these things are used for?! I'll frikken show you if you want!" She walked over by each machine. "This one, this one is fun! You lay in the middle and it stretches you until you can feel every bone and joint pop in your body!" Her hand motions were wild with emotion. "This one is appealing too. You lay in the middle of the circle and they strap every limb down and turn the wheel. You are basically being made into a human ball! Maybe they want to play with you." She walked over to another side of the room and opened another door.  
  
"See those bonds right there? They put your arms in them and that's when the real fun begins! There you have your choice of a pain stick, hand device, or even weapons we have like hot metal, coldness, anything sharp, all of that good stuff!" Her voice sounded like someone who was telling what the prizes were on a game show, which was frightening. She walked to yet another side of the room and hit the button for it to open a door.  
  
"This place, now I spent A LOT of time here. This shit, man, this shit messes with you." She walked into the room this time, which sent chills down everyone's spine: it was the same room that Alumbi had them all in when they were in his ship. She walked back to the same counter and pulled out the chemicals she had used before.  
  
"The blue one is probably the best. After you have even a milligram of it, you're gone for a few days. You have nothing to do with your body. And here? This green stuff, it plays with you. You're where you think you aren't, you are with people you want to be with but aren't, it's a real will breaks. Mix them together, it's one hell of a bash!" She was holding up each vial and thrashing them in his face. Then she walked over to where they all dreaded even more.  
  
"And mix those and this together, it's a night you'll never forget, that's for sure." She hit a button as the tell-tale bed came down from the wall. The sarcasm in her words were gone, now it was sadness and dread.  
  
"And it's never over," she stated as she pointed to a sarcophagus. Jack wondered how many times she had used it.  
  
"Sam, I, god I'msosorryididn'tknow!" Daniel was so flabbergasted and embarrassed. He wanted to know what happened to her, but not like this.   
  
"Colonel, are we ready to leave now?" she asked with a flat voice.  
  
"We sure the hell are." He walked out first, then followed by her and Teal'c. Daniel was too humiliated to walk with the three of them. It was a VERY long walk back to the Stargate. Daniel wanted to talk to Sam again, and explain.  
  
"Sam, please, let me talk to you." He jogged up a bit to keep up with her. His hat fell off, and he reached back to grab it. She just ignored him, looked forward, and kept walking.   
  
"Sam, please," he started again.  
  
"Daniel, stop. Just leave her alone." Jack turned around, trying to put a stop to everything and just get home so he could hide from everyone for a while. He knew that's what she would be doing, and he needed to for a while. He thought Daniel was going to say something to him, so he turned and looked at him with a stern 'don't talk don't say anything' look', and Daniel shut up for the remainder of the walk.  
  
"Dad! Good to see you." SG-1 returned to see Jacob Carter standing on the bottom of the ramp. The fake enthusiasm wasn't fooling anyone, but he obviously didn't have time for it right then and there.  
  
"You too Sam. There's something you're going to want to know about." The seriousness in his eyes was a bit discerning, and frightening.  
  
"Loscar! It's good to see you again. But what are you doing here? And where's Tamali?" She was a bit surprised to see him, since Tamali was the leader now, and there was supposed to be someone over there now, which was actually her father, instead of them over here. He and General Hammond were sitting in the briefing room when they all walked in, still in their gear.  
  
"Sam, he's dead." She stopped walking and cocked her head at him.  
  
"What? He's dead? How?" She sat down in the chair right next to him in a single movement.  
  
"Sam, we thought it would help. We didn't know what we were doing, and Tamali didn't even want to, it wasn't even his fault. I'm sorry!" His face contorted as he admitted to something no one knew about yet.  
  
"Loscar. Listen to me. What did you do?" Her voice was hard and slow, deliberate with her words.  
  
"We brought him back Sam! We thought we could control him! But we couldn't Sam, we couldn't! We put him in the sarcophagus…" He covered his face with his hands. She kneeled on the floor in front of him.  
  
"Who?" she asked, almost afraid of the answer. Time seemed to stop.  
  
"Alumbi." She was holding onto his wrists to move his hands when he said his name. Her world stopped, and she could feel her heart beat.   
  
'No, this couldn't be happening,' she thought to herself. The look of utter despair and daze on her face shocked everyone. They all thought that she was starting to get over it, but now they knew it was a front.   
  
"Loscar, how could you? After everything he did to us, to me, to you… you brought him back! Look at everyone he murdered that we cared about. And you gave him life? How? Why? How could you?" She was on her knees before him, her hands on his face forcing him to look at her, into the depths of her eyes to see her sadness. Her voice was quite, almost a whisper. It was the most emotional many people had seen her in a long time.   
  
"We thought that if we brought him back, we could learn information from him to help you!" She looked down from him; he did mean well, but it didn't work at all. She took a second to gather herself and put her front back up.  
  
"Where is he?" she asked, in the military mode the found her in.  
  
"He has his ship back. He's using it's defenses so we can't get in. And he blocked the same passage way that you went in and we came out of. A few Jaffa remained loyal, but not too many."  
  
"What we could do is almost the same thing, take the hill again. This time we can't take the passage way, but we would have better equipment to use. We could use some claymores to take down the shields. With only a few Jaffa to take down, it should be fairly simple, nothing that we haven't faced before. SG-1 couldn't do it along, though. We would need a few other SG teams as back up." She took a second to look around the room. Everyone had an amused look on their face because of how she just assumed that she would get everything she wanted for it.   
  
"If that's alright with you General," she added.  
  
"You have SG teams 2, 5, 8, and 12 as back up. You leave as soon as you check through the infirmary. Dismissed!" He smiled as he told her. Maybe his Sam Carter wasn't lost after all.   
  
TBC… oh I'm such a tease!! 


	9. Just a Silly Feeling Chapter 9

Title: Just a Silly Feeling Chapter 9  
  
Spoilers: Just common knowledge  
  
Rating: Gonna make it R for this one, mention of not so nice stuff  
  
Disclaimer: Not mine don't sue me!  
  
AN: Wow! Thanks for all of the positive comments guys! I wouldn't even be writing this right now if you didn't want it! It's nice outside kinda, and my sister wants me to go out, but I was thinking, "No I have to finish the chapter! I have too many ideas!!" Hope you all enjoy!  
  
SGC personnel, Tok'Ra, Sam's people, and the rebel Jaffa who joined them mingled in front of the Stargate after they first arrived. They didn't want to be too obvious to alert anyone who might have been watching, but they still didn't know where to go yet. Her people weren't sure that they were going to come.   
  
"Loscar, what territory do you have left?" Sam asked to try to get the operation moving.  
  
"We have basically the same areas as before. He hasn't become too powerful yet, so we're lucky."   
  
"Indeed…" Teal'c added dryly.  
  
"Teal'c? Was that sarcasm I heard?" Jack turned around to look at him surprised. Teal'c only nodded his head in response. "I'm so proud, it's like when your son graduates from high school…" Sam only chose to ignore this interaction.  
  
"So we have the same living areas as before right?"  
  
"Yes Sam."  
  
"Ok listen up everyone! There's a camp area secured about two miles away from the gate. SG-2, I want you guys to stay here and guard it. Everyone else, move out." No one really wanted to say anything to her. They knew what hell she went through, and they were happy enough just to be with her and help her get this creep, much less take orders from her. Jack just smiled.  
  
Everyone was excited to see Sam again. People were running up to her, smiling and trying to hug her. Sam tried back, but she was in military mode once again. She signaled for the leaders of each SGC team and any Tok'Ra leaders to come and talk.  
  
"So we're going to do this very much like SG-1 did before. The main difference is that we don't have a tunnel to go through, but we have other options. The rebel Jaffa have agreed to help us, and they know back doors to get us in. I want bombs set up all around the perimeter of the ship, and to be blown before the attack. Then, 15 meters behind that I want the same thing in case we need back up and have none." She was looking down and pointed out on the same map she had before.  
  
"You like your explosives," she heard someone say. Everyone wondered what her reaction would be; maybe she would get mad and throw a zat gun again Jack thought.  
  
"Sure do. What sane girl wouldn't?" she replied and surprised everyone with a cheeky grin.  
  
"After the first explosives go off, I want SG teams 5, 8, and 12 to stay outside and take down anyone who tries to get out. Actually, SG-12, you're going to give SG-1 back up inside the ship. There aren't that many Jaffa left compared to how many people we have, and we do have the second line of explosives. We'll be ok with that. SG-1 will infiltrate the ship, and take out the enemy for good this time." The leaders of the teams shared a quick glance around the table as Sam looked at the map and agreed on one thing: she was born to lead. They would follow her to death in this battle.  
  
"Any questions?" No one spoke up. "Ok, let's go fill in the troops then."  
  
"Sam." Jacob came up next to her as she was watching all of the preparations.  
  
"Dad."  
  
"Are you," he started.  
  
"Don't even say ok. Because we both know I'm not. My mind isn't letting my emotions live right now. If it does I die, and I can't allow that to happen. I have to be like this Dad. We can do the whole "how are you" thing after, ok?" she interrupted. She wouldn't even look at him, and he was ok with that. He's done some really hard things in his life too, and however anyone wants to deal is ok by him.  
  
"I was going to say hungry," he said. She turned and looked at him for a second, then let out a laugh with some of her nervousness.   
  
"Thanks Dad."  
  
The fight was on. They were moving into position. They waited for her signal to blow the explosives. When they went off, it was like a symphony in her mind. The explosion was the sound of the trumpets alerting attendees that the show was about to start.   
  
The violins had their solo as the gun noise invaded her thoughts. The music was quick and the pace was steady. The different violinists were taking turns watching out for each other, making sure everyone was there for the next stanza.   
  
The timpanis thundered to life when the Jaffa fired their staff weapons at them. The three notes were repeating, but always in a different rhythm. Sometimes it came fast; sometimes they couldn't hear the different pitches. Right in the middle of the dog fight of the song, something bad happened.  
  
"Lower your weapons, we have you surrounded." Daniel, Teal'c and Jack were separated from Sam and Jacob. All around them were Jaffa, who were pointing their staff weapons at them. They had no choice, they had to surrender. Slowly they put their weapons to the ground and followed the Jaffa leader.  
  
"Dad! We have to get them," she whispered.  
  
"I know Sam, but we can't follow them." They were hiding behind a wall.   
  
"I know. But I know where they're being taken." Jacob nodded to her, and he followed her after all of the Jaffa had left the immediate clearing.   
  
"Colonel Jack O'Neill! Daniel Jackson! And Teal'c. What has happened to your other companion Jonas Quinn?" They were forced on their knees as soon as their name was spoken. They were once again in Alumbi's chamber, the same one they were in last time. Two Jaffa stood guard and put them in restraints in the room as the remaining ones left.  
  
"What? Aren't you glad to see us?" Jack's voice was flat.  
  
"On the contrary Colonel, I'm overjoyed to see you. If you're here, that means she's here as well." His eyes lit as he mentioned her, and his fingers clasped together. He was too happy about that face.  
  
"Screw off you chode! You won't get anywhere near her!" Jack struggled against his restraints.   
  
"Now now now Jack! I know I've had my fair share of her. But you've had your chance! And whether or not you went for it is none of my business. This wonderful opportunity graced itself to me, and I'm not going to run away from it. If you didn't, you don't know what you're missing. When she was with me, I could hear her whimpering. I think she called out for your help a few times." He went in to touch Jack in the face, but he tried to bite him. "But it only intensified my pleasure. The struggle, ooh it was magnificent!" His hands were jumping around, trying to show how great it was for him. Then he bent over like he was going to give some advice. "You should really try it out sometime. Unless, she doesn't want to. But I have something to help you with that. No one ever says no to me and doesn't actually get away with it." His voice was quite with pleasure, both in remembering his nights with her and seeing the torture effect it had on Jack.   
  
"Fuck you!" he screamed as he struggled against his restraints to get him. He was tying to stand, but his chains were too close to the floor. His arms were wrenched back, but he didn't care how much it hurt right now. He wanted to kill Alumbi now even more than ever. Alumbi came oh-so-close to touching him. Daniel and Teal'c were pulling just as hard against their restraints. No one should talk like that about their Sam, no one.  
  
"And if you'd like, I can show you where to touch her." It was a whisper only heard by Jack. Jacks yelling was interrupted by gun shots. Both Jack's and Alumbi's heads snapped towards to door.  
  
"How did you-" Alumbi started. Sam stood in the door way, dead Jaffa at her feet. He was shocked to see her so alive and strong against him. It showed on his face when his mouth gaped open.  
  
"Like this." With that said, she walked forward. With every step she took, she fired a round into him. First into his chest. Then his head. Then any body part she hadn't hit. Even when he fell to the ground, she stood above in him an executioner style still shooting. Jacob went and let everyone out of their restraints. She had fired all of her rounds, but she couldn't stop.  
  
"Sam, please, stop," Jacob quietly asked. She was standing above his dead body, still rhythmically pulling the trigger with no bullets emerging, no expression on her face.  
  
"Sam, come on, we need to get out of here." Jack came to the other side of her. Right now all he wanted to do was carry her out of there and never let her out of his sight again. He touched her arm to lower it, which brought her back to reality.   
  
She shook her head to sort things out. Jack and Jacob turned her around and tried to walk her out of there, but she was still looking at him.  
  
"Sam, let's go." Daniel called out to her from the doorway. But she wasn't finished yet. She broke away from Jack and Jacob and threw her gun at Alumbi's dead body, half grunting and half screaming at it. She tried to run to his body, but was restrained by her father and friends.  
  
"Don't bring him back to life this time." Sam looked at Loscar and then at the gate, ready to leave forever. They suffered no victims, and the rest of the Jaffa were being taken by the Tok'Ra. The SG teams couldn't care at the moment what they did with them. Jacob said that with the new rebel Jaffa, maybe they could try and work another agreement and treaty out again.  
  
"I promise Sam, I won't." She only looked at him when the wormhole engaged.   
  
"Alright guys, let's go home." Most of the SG teams had left before her, but SG-1 left after.  
  
"She's going to need us guys." Daniel stood with Teal'c and Jack as they watched her walk through. She looked exhausted as her posture hung. Her shoulders sagged and almost dropped her pack. Even her eyes needed a rest. It was going to be even harder than before.  
  
"Indeed."  
  
TBC… almost done I promise….!!!! 


	10. Just a Silly Feeling Chap 10

Title: Just a Silly Feeling Chapter 10  
  
Spoilers: None really  
  
Rating: PG-13 just incase.  
  
Disclaimer: Not mine don't sue me.  
  
AN: Holy buckets! I finally finished! Thank you SO VERY MUCH to everyone who read this! I really hope that you enjoy the final installment. This chapter is dedicated to everyone who has ever had a hardship to overcome, so, it's for everyone. Enjoy!  
  
Sam was working on, well, something in her lab. She didn't really know what it was. It was something that kept her away from everyone, which is all she really cared about. She was tired of all the sympathetic looks she received from people.  
  
"Hey Sam," Daniel called out, leaning against the frame of her doorway. She quickly looked up at him and then looked back at whatever she was doing.  
  
"Hi Daniel."  
  
"Hiding out?" She nodded at him, or so he assumed.  
  
"Yeah, you've got to give everyone a break. It's been a crazy week." It was hard for him to believe that only a week had past since their coup of Alumbi and his forces.  
  
"Yep." He walked fully into the room, hands in pockets.  
  
"Hey, I never got to fully apologize to you for the way I acted when we found that chamber." He waited to see some reaction from her, but she gave none.  
  
"That's ok." He could tell her voice was fake so that he would leave her alone.   
  
"No, Sam, it's really not. I should have stopped when everyone was telling me to. I just didn't really realize what it -was." The last word came out after he snatched her gadget away from her. She turned around to see his annoyed face.  
  
"Sam, are you going to deal with this?"  
  
"Deal with what?"  
  
"Don't be stupid. We all know that you went through hell with him. Honestly, I wouldn't know where to start to understand. This is one of the worst things someone could endure. Just the humiliation you had to suffer alone is bad enough without the physical aspect of torture."  
  
"Daniel!" she tried to interrupt. He waved a finger to let him finish. He was just glad to get any reaction from her.  
  
"But remember Sam. You weren't the only on affected by this. We looked for you Sam. God we searched all over the universe for you! Jack carried your picture with you and asked random people on planets if they had seen you!" That comment made her look at the ground. "Sam, we were dead without you. We went through our own torture looking for you, and wondering if you were alive, and if you would ever be home again. What you would be like if you did get back home. If you would remember us. If you would have all four limbs. God anything about you Sam! Jack took it the worst! You should have seen him the say the General announced that the official search was off." She had been too ashamed to look at him until now.  
  
"What happened?"  
  
"Jack would kill me if you knew."  
  
"Please Daniel?" He looked into her eyes and saw the need to believe in something, and right now, this is all he had for her.  
  
"Ok, but don't tell him I told you."  
  
General Hammond's office 6 months ago  
  
"Boys, I'm afraid I have some bad news for you." Daniel and Jonas were close to Hammond's desk, and Teal'c and Jack were in the back brooding.  
  
"Sir?" Jack asked quietly from the back.  
  
"We have to call off the search for Major Carter." He looked down at his desk, trying to avoid eye contact with anyone. Jack pushed past Daniel and Jonas.  
  
"Sir! You can't! It's only been four weeks!" His voice was full of desperation and urgency.  
  
"I'm sorry Colonel! I don't want to! But we can't keep using all of our resources looking for one soldier." He looked Jack right in the eye.  
  
"One soldier?! One soldier who saved this planet more than anyone else combined! One soldier who was willing to give her life for anyone! One soldier who introduced us to the Tok'Ra! One soldier who wouldn't sleep until she knew everyone on her team was home safe and sound!" At this point, Jack was yelling, face to face with the general, damned the consequences.  
  
"Jack I'm sorry. I know what she meant to you. Just because the official search is off doesn't mean she's lost forever." The softness and quietness in his voice surprised everyone, mostly Jack. He had expected to get yelled at, thrown out, something. But when the General made it personal, he couldn't take it. Jack's tense body grasped the desk in front of him.  
  
"Dismissed soldier." Jack stormed out of the room.   
  
He walked to his room, unaware that Daniel was walking after him. He didn't care who was in his way. It could have been the Dalai Lama for all he cared. He needed to get away. The looks he received in the hallway that would usually bother him didn't even faze him.  
  
He entered his room, whipping the door behind him so hard that it didn't close, it only bounced off the frame and went back open. He grasped the edge of his desk very much like how he grabbed the General's. Daniel was in the doorway, unsure if he should enter at the moment. Jack let out a yell and flipped his desk over. Daniel jumped back from the door way in shock.   
  
Then Jack grabbed onto the first thing he could find and chucked it across the room, continuing to throw whatever he could see, giving a war cry with each item. Daniel had never seen him so cross and upset. After he was finished throwing everything, he staggered to the wall behind him. As soon as his back hit, he slid down, agony written all over his face. He bent his knees after a moment, and put his elbows on them so he could put his head in his hands.   
  
Daniel knew he needed to go in. He walked in and sat down next to Jack. Not knowing what was making him do it, he touched Jack's arm. He was expecting Jack to get mad, hit him, walk out of the room, to yell. Not for Jack to look at him.  
  
The look of his face was heart wrenching enough that Daniel didn't even need the loss of Sam to feel sorry for Jack. Daniel put his arm around Jack's back and Jack actually moved to Daniel. Daniel's other arm when to cross Jack, and Jack clung onto his with his hand for dear life. He hid his head behind Daniel's arm.  
  
"Jack," was all Daniel said. Jack began to shake in Daniel's makeshift embrace, and started to cry. At first there was no sound, but then the sobs came. Unbeknown to them, they had two guards. Teal'c was standing guard outside of the door facing the hallway. Jonas was trying to keep people from going into the hallway. Those who braved it didn't dare look into the room if Teal'c was there, even if they could guess what was going on.  
  
He had actually passed out from all of the exertion. The team took him into the infirmary and laid him down on a bed. The three also crashed there that night, needing to be there. Instead of giving them grief, Janet joined them. She took it just as hard as anyone. And Daniel was also there to help her wipe away her tears.  
  
When Jack woke up the next morning, he was a little disoriented. Then, the memories of the day before sank in. He swung his legs over the side of the bed, making sure not to kick a sleeping Jonas. He posture was hunched, and he rubbed his face and ran his hands through his hair. He looked up to see Daniel sitting on the opposite bed, looking just as shabby.  
  
"Thanks," he said, nodding his head. And that was all that needed to be said between the two.  
  
Sam's eyes widened with shock as Daniel finished his story.  
  
"Oh, Daniel, I, god I'm so sorry! I don't even, Jesus!" She has having problems even trying to think of what to say to him.   
  
"I can't believe how selfish I've been lately! That never occurred to me! And the Colonel, what he's all done for me, oh god!" Her hands were on hear head in disbelieve. She actually looked like she was going to be sick.  
  
"Sam, it's ok. You know now." He helped her stand straight. He couldn't stay mad at her. He realized that she didn't even consider what everyone else was going through.   
  
He pulled her into a tight embrace, never wanting to let go. He took the moment to savor having her again. God he missed her. She hugged back just as tightly, not wanting to ever lose him again.  
  
"Daniel, I'm sooo sorry," she muttered into his shoulder.  
  
"Shh Sam. It's ok now. It'll all get better soon, I promise." He rubbed her back and slowly swayed back and forth. She slowly pulled away and looked up at him, still holding on.  
  
"I've got to talk to everyone."  
  
"Yeah, you do."  
  
"Teal'c! Wait up a second!" she called down the hallway. He was heading towards the mess hall.   
  
"MajorCarter. May I be any assistance?" he asked as she crossed the distance between them  
  
"Yeah, um, let's go in there," she said as she looked for an empty room. She didn't want everything to be public.  
  
"Teal'c, I just finished talking to Daniel, and, good lord I'm sorry," she said to him as he closed the door. He turned his head and raised his trademark eyebrow.  
  
"MajorCarter?"  
  
"For the way I've been acting. I realized now what everyone went through when you were trying to find me, and I guess I haven't been very grateful. And I am. I've very grateful. If I knew you guys weren't going to be here for me when I got back, I wouldn't have wanted to come home at all. Teal'c I'm so sorry." She walked up to him and hugged him, which surprised him. After a moment, he returned her hug, both holding on for a while.  
  
"I am glad you have returned to yourself, MajorCarter." He smiled at her.  
  
"Yeah me too," she laughed. "Do you know where the Colonel is by chance?"  
  
"He left for the evening. I believe he said he had the Simpsons to watch?"  
  
"Thanks Teal'c, for everything." She smiled at him and walked away.  
  
She walked up to his door, trying to will up the courage to ring the doorbell. She put her finger on top of the button, and then quickly took it away. Shaking her head, she thought of what she needed to do and forcefully pushed the button. Jack came to the door, wearing a black shirt and jeans, his white socks showing at the bottom. He opened up the door with a beer bottle in his hand, looking surprised.  
  
"Cater! What can I do for you?" he asked, happy to see her. Anytime he saw her was good now a days. He wasn't upset with her, just wondering what brought her to his house.  
  
"Hi, sir. I was wondering if I could talk to you," she said to him.  
  
"Ah, sure. Come on it." He held the door open for her. She walked through the hallway and took her jacket off. She was wearing black stretch pants with a white shirt, long sleeved, v neck. She took off her leather jack and put it over the edge of his couch.  
  
"Beer?" he asked.  
  
"Yeah, we're both probably going to need a few." At that exact moment, a 'Do'h!' was heard from his TV.  
  
'Did I just say that?' he thought to himself. He looked nervous and apprehensive as he disappeared to get a new beer for himself and one for her. She was sitting on his couch when he came back.   
  
"So. Carter. You wanted to… talk," he started. Even his voice sounded nervous.  
  
"Yeah." She didn't say anything else until after she took a drink. 'Wow, that felt good,' she thought.  
  
"Ok. I had a talk with Daniel today. And it made me realize a lot of things. And I need to apologize to you."  
  
"What?" he interrupted her.  
  
"No wait. Let me finish." He nodded, looked at her funny, and took a drink. He knew that this would be interesting.  
  
"When I was gone, and even now, I never thought about what you all went through. I was caught up in my own thoughts, and trying to avoid everyone. I didn't care about anything except forgetting what happened to me." She stopped to think about what she wanted to say.  
  
"And now," Jack prompted.  
  
"And now, I do realize what you went through. And god Jack, I'm sorry. I should have thought about what was happening to everyone before I tuned everyone out of my life." He looked confused.  
  
"Well, I'm not supposed to say anything, but Daniel told me about the night you found out that the search for me was getting called off."   
  
"Oh…" he said quietly, and took a long drink of beer. 'Wow this is tastes really good right now,' he thought to himself.  
  
"And here I am, running around, ignoring everyone that is trying to help me. And now I realize that they need me as much as I need them." She sat so she was facing him, one leg curled under the other, put her bottle on the table by her, and put her hand on his.  
  
"I'm sorry Jack," she whispered, looking down.  
  
"Wow Sam, we missed you." His voice started to crack with emotion.  
  
"I know I missed you too." She was holding his hand in hers. He moved his hand so he was holding hers, and raised it to his face, feeling the warmth, reassuring himself that she was really there. His eyes were squeezed shut, trying not to become emotional. She moved her other hand to the other side of her face, and leaned in to kiss him.   
  
It was very much the same as the one they shared when they found her. Nothing sexual about it. They needed each other, but not that way right now. She moved into him, and he held her. She held back as hard as she could, never wanting to let go.  
  
"I'm so sorry," she whispered again into his chest, starting to cry. She was loosing control, and he didn't like it. But there as was nothing she could do.  
  
"Me too Sam. Me too." He let a tear slip out, trying to squeeze the rest in. They sat there, apologizing to each other, crying onto each other, holding each other, never wanting to let go of each other, for the rest of the night, until sleep overcame them.   
  
"Major. Are you ready?" General Hammond was standing on the bottom of the ramp behind Sam and her team.   
  
Jack had spoken to the General about her skills, along with the other commanders of the teams that went with them. It was due time she had her own. It hadn't been an easy road. She talked to everyone she needed to, had nights out with Janet, and finally started to come to terms with what had happened.  
  
"Yes sir." She smiled at him, and he smiled back. He was so proud of her. He knew he wasn't supposed to have favorites…. But he couldn't help it. Only Sam could come back from that.   
  
"You have a go!" he said. She saluted him, and he saluted her back before she walked into the wormhole.   
  
She walked behind her team, just like she was supposed to. Before she went through, she turned around and saw Jack in the control room, smiling down on her. She smiled back, remembering a small piece of advice he gave her.  
  
When they were talking about what happened, he asked her a question: Why did she throw two guns at Alumbi? She was stunned; she didn't even realize it. When he told her, all she could do was laugh. Then, he told her that when she led her team, just to have a few extra guns to throw at enemies. Then, he told her she had her own team.  
  
Taking a refreshing breath of air, she turned around and kept her smile on, and walked through the wormhole, knowing that she could handle whatever was on the other side. And if she couldn't, she knew she had people who could.  
  
The end 


End file.
